WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?.. That is the question.

KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side.

PLATO: For the greater good.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

ARISTOTLE2: To actualize its potential.

KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.

TIMOTHY LEARY: Because that's the only trip the establishment would let it take.

SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

SADDAM HUSSEIN2: It is the Mother of all Chickens.

JOSEPH STALIN: I don't care. Catch it. I need its eggs to make my omelet.

DR. SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes the chicken crossed the road, but why it cross it, I've not been told!

O.J.: It didn't. I was playing golf with it at the time.

JACK NICHOLSON: 'cause it f.....g wanted to. That's the f.....g reason.

RONALD REAGAN: I forget.

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

HIPPOCRATES: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.

ARTHUR ANDERSEN CONSULTANT: Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken wasfaced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful.

LOUIS FARRAKHAN: The road, you see, represents the black man. The chicken 'crossed' the black man in order to trample him and keep him down.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

MOSES: And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken,"Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

CARL JUNG: The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at this historical juncture, and, therefore, synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being.

JOHN LOCKE: Because he was exercising his natural right to liberty.

ALBERT CAMUS: It doesn't matter; the chicken's actions have no meaning except to him.

THE BIBLE: And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the Chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

FOX MULDER: It was a government conspiracy.

FOX MULDER2: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it?

RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.

MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway?

FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.

THOMAS DE TORQUEMADA: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.

BILL GATES: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.

OLIVER STONE: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"

DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.

DARWIN 2: It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.

THE POPE: That is only for God to know.

M.C.ESCHER: That depends on which plane of reality the chicken was on at the time.

GEORGE ORWELL: Because the government had fooled him into thinking that he was crossing the road of his own free will, when he was really only serving their interests.

IMMANUEL KANT: The chicken, being an autonomous being, chose to cross the road of his own free will.

GRANDPA: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken had crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

DIRK GENTLY (Holistic Detective): I'm not exactly sure why, but right now I've got a horse in my bathroom.

NIETZSCHE: Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road gazes also across you.

B.F. SKINNER: Because the external influences, which had pervaded its sensorium from birth, had caused it to develop in such a fashion that it would tend to cross roads, even while believing these actions to be of its own freewill.

JEAN-PAUL SARTRE: In order to act in good faith and be true to itself, the chicken found it necessary to cross the road.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

ALBERT EINSTEIN2: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

PYRRHO THE SKEPTIC: What road?

THE SPHINX: You tell me.

BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.

RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road ....it transcended it.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.

COLONEL SANDERS: I missed one?

Kayo?? Why the chicken crossed the road??

END OF THE WORLD.. Kuno.

Good day, sexy people!!

after countless months of being blogless.. I finally have something to blog about. (GAWD. I miss blogging.)

uhmmm, honestly, I got tired of blogging because there are so many things to blog about.. So many special things that happened in a short span of time..

Well, this blog post is about our family dinner bonding time stuff.. (trivia, OUR ULAM is pritong tilapia.)

we just watched KNOWING starring Nicholas Cage, and it talks about the End of the WORLD of something like that. in the movie, there's this solar flare that will engulf the Earth and destroy our atmosphere, locking us within a poisonous cloud of gas..

So, over dinner, my mom, my 2 brothers and I were arguing what is the most possible way the world can end..

my mom said that..

Maybe there's a very huge meteor that will hit the Earth... that is, apparently LARGER than the EARTH.

to this thought, I argued:

Ma, Hindi naman pwedeng makahila ng mas malaki sa size ng Earth ang gravity ng Earth eh!

then my bro said..

hindi, ate, baka ang sinasabi ni mama, yung Sun ang makakahila ng meteor, tapos nagkataong nasa direksyon ng meteor yung EARTH! tapos sasalpok!

then I argued again..

hala! posible ba yun? siguro, pwedeng magmeet, pero hindi naman siguro malakas yung impact nun kasi parehas lang yung acceleration ng gravity ng Sun sa kahit na anong heavenly body, kahit na ano pa yung mass nya.. End of the world na ba agad yun??

then my 2nd brother said..

tama na nga yung meteor! eh yung sa great flood, O, diba end of the world din yun?

I argued (again).

hala! sino nagsabi na matatapos yung mundo ng ganun-ganun na lang..? nagsi-circulate lang naman yung water content ng Earth eh.. So kung baha yung isang part, tuyo naman somewhere else! hindi naman pwedeng maging all-water yung mundo no!

.. Soon, we were arguing again about how God can make things possible.. and my mom even scolded me because I have this freaky idea that God is still having fun playing with us so He won't just end the world like that. (bad.)

But, in the end. we all settled. because one roll of BRAZO de MERCEDES was laid on our dinner table.

END OF DISCUSSION. hahahaha!

MULTIPLY

this blog is now redirected to..

http://afp911.multiply.com/


LONG LIVE, CRAPASUTRA!
^_^

Divine Intervention?! (UP vs. Ateneo)

Gosh. Is this true? (If you can't see this clearly, ADMU: 58.. UP: fuckin' 68)
The low-profile, ever defeated UP Fighting Maroons DEFEATED the ATENEO BLUE EAGLES (ehem. Champions?), Sunday, July 27, 2009 on a very rainy sunset in PhilSports Arena (Ultra), Pasig City.

And, of course, I was one of the stunned children of God that witnessed this very very unexpected game.
Now, I can say.. Nothing is damn impossible.

That was a rainy afternoon. Angelo, a very special friend of mine, treated me with a lower box ticket to the game.. He was pissed off when I got there late. (ehem, almost an hour.)
So we entered the arena, 3pm-ish. and seated there with some Ateneans. It was Adamson Soaring Falcons vs. DLSU Green Archers.
The game was pretty close. It's so intense, there's a five minute overtime.. But DLSU grabbed their victory.

What made me more nervous was when I realized how notorious the Ateneo crowd can be. I mean, they were like "hoy! adamson! wag nyo panalunin yung mga BOBO!".. And they were cheering for any opponent DLSU has.. They also insult the crowd, telling that the "green" crowd was heartless. "parang nilulumot" in some way. hahaha! Cool people.

Before the UP vs. Ateneo game started, Angelo and I found some seats on the Ateneo side. Of course, I would still go with him even if I'm cheering for UP.

But then, I think I got the best seat in the house.. because I was in the middle of the cracked crowd of Ateneo. Across the arena, there was the FORTUNATE FEW UP Maroons. I think only 20 UP students were seating on the lowerbox level. Almost all of the UP crowd was seated in the Gallery Area (general admissions). I guess only 80 students attended that game. (minus the pep squad)

Throughout the game, everyone was looking at the scoreboard, thinking "is this fuckin' possible?!" During the first half, the Ateneans were obviously confident that they would win.. The score was still close, and the Blue Eagles was able to keep UP's advantage short by scoring every after a Maroon goal.

OK, Half time break. Ateneo performed. (haha.)
Then the UP Cheering squad performed. Even without pompoms, they nailed it. I mean, REALLY NAILED IT. That was the best routine I've seen live. (yet.)
you should just check that out on YouTube. It's beyond words.

2nd half. The tension is really building up our side (Ateneo side).. The big guys in front of me were kept silent as I scream my voicebox out whenever UP steals and shoots a basket. (hmmm. So you can guess how painful it is for me to shout everytime they score.)

Angelo was cheering his heart out for his team, of course.. And, because I was on the Ateneo side, I hear their cheers and drums louder.. Gosh, you can't imagine how jumpy my heart is whenever they bang their drums. =P

Hmmm, but hey, it was fun, because my voice seemed louder when I cheer for UP when I'm seating on the Ateneo side.

CRAP. they rain threes.. they shoot. I mean, this is my first ever live game.. but, I can't believe this.. I heard from all people how the UP Maroons suck. I mean, the whole nation says UP Maroons suck at UAAP Basketball. Now, what kind of "sucking" is this?!

The last minute. I noticed almost all Ateneans were holding their cellphones. and they're somewhat silent.. I guess they were texting their friends about the game. No one will believe it. But hell, who cares about how many will believe. It happened. Hands Down.

Hey, Angelo was pretty nervous. He cannot believe it. I think I really pissed him off (and his blue-shirted schoolmates) because I kept on cheering for UP. I was jumping and screaming all over the place. (poise? bye-bye.)

OK, so, finally, the game ended..

hmmmm.. It's morning already.. I think I'll let the world speak about this unbelievable crap.

As for me, I'm tired. I'm sleepy. My voice cracked. My legs hurt. My eyes droopy..
MY HEART FULFILLED.

NowPLAYING:
the ice is getting thinner - death cab for cutie
ego - Beyonce
Mrs. Officer - Lil' Wayne
I'm You - Leona Lewis & Ne-yo
Don't stop till you get enough - Michael jackson
remember the time - Michael Jackson
Never say never - the fray
kelsey - metro station
Calle Ocho - Pitbull
I'm Real (Jennifer Lopez) - The Starting Line
When I grow up (pussycat dolls) - Mayday Parade

07-23-09 (Random. Random. Random.)

It's been soooo long since I posted a blog.. It's not because I'm busy or anything, hehe, I don't consider myself busy because I'm still wanting more. (what?)

Anyway, This is supposed to be a random post. So..

1. I'm known as "The sexy dancer" in our Freshie batch. It creeps me out because some people just greet me and say, "hey, you're the sexy dancer right?" along the corridors of Palma Hall. Crap.
2. Why? Mainly because of Daniel Frago. He kinda forced me to dance during our Freshman Orientation.. (which I won.)
3. I love my Philo11-Logic class. Hehehe! It's the hardest thing I have ever known in my life. I mean, the class is great! Our professor, Mr. de Villa, is very funny.. especially when he curses "yung mga skul sa tabi-tabi".. (with respect to other schools)
4. He told us that studying LOGIC is important.. "Lalo na kapag pumunta kayo sa Starbucks dyan sa tabi-tabi, tapos may lumapit sayo na gwapong inglisero.. Itanong mo, IS THIS ARGUMENT VALID? If P results to A and Q..."
5. But then, the "legendary" long exam in Logic is making me nervous as the days pass. No one knows how to answer that stuff (except for my PhilSci alumni classmates).
6. Next to my Logic class is Badminton. And the really significant thing about it is that everytime I attend that class, it rains. I mean, it's raining effin' hard.
7. I joined the Volleyball team in Bacbacan 2009. Bacbacan is like a sportsfest initiated by the CBA council. I'm so excited! Hahaa! our first game is against the TERMINALS (5th year BAA students) Yikes! Well, respect the elderly! =)
8. Rodic's Tapsilog is one of the best meals I have taken.. I actually travel 6pesos a day just to get to UP shopping center and eat tapsilog. hahaha! If you're visiting UP, make sure you try it. =)
9. Hmmm.. Math 17..? not that hard. I still score some touchdowns there.. And besides, I'm super inspired in that class.. I have a crush on a guy named.. (gosh, I'm too shy to say his name here..).. My friends already know about it, and they say my crush looks like my ex-crush in CMSHS. (what?!).. Haha!
10. I'm still one week away from an ADB dance concert.. I'm practicing every Saturday, and.. guess what song was assigned to us..? JAI HO! Crap. I wish the costume is not that revealing or anything! Keep your fingers crossed!
11. My ADHD attacks again. I do crazy hiphop stunts at home. I don't know how to do it but I think my body really wants to release a very harmonic pleasure through hiphop. Weird.
12. UPCAT is coming, Good Luck, Seniors!

Now Playing:
Barely Breathing - Duncan Sheik
Colorado Sunrise - 3oh!3
Clint Eastwood - Gorillaz
Mrs. Officer - Lil' Wayne
Ironic - Alanis Morisette (classic.)
Remembering Sunday - All Time Low
Move Along - The All American Rejects

06-03-09.. KOIZORA.. *sniff sniff*

Hey..! You're eyes are all dried up.. Have you stayed too long surfing online??
I have a solution for that..! Now you don't have to suffer bloodshot, dry and irritated eyes.. Watch this movie, KOIZORA.. Its about a girl named Mika who retells her story using her cellphone.. (OK, cellphone romance? I'm guilty.)

A real tearjerker. The protagonists are a bit plain, but that simplicity added the spice to the movie.. No exaggerations, this is plain pop drama.

Now I have to clean up my desk, there's a whole bunch of teary tissues around. See yah!

http://www.mysoju.com/koizora

06-03-09.. (6+3=9) ..YouTube stuff..!

here's some of the stuff I encountered while bloghopping.. =)



Wow.. Hey, Gayfriends! You have a new video to worship..! Raise your BIG EGOS..!



And.. New Moon, now, I would like to watch this one, unlike Twilight, New Moon will feature my lycanthrophic hottie, Jacob Black. hahah! Watch it guys, and drool.